I’ve been posting so much about our adoption I thought I would take the time to post a little about what life is like right now right here.
I’m LOVING life right now, so much so that often I wonder if I’m going to struggle once the babies come because life will change… drastically. I tend to want to anticipate change and prepare for it and so sometimes I just live my day as if I already have 4 children, meaning that I don’t go anywhere and I’m okay with that because I tell myself that next year I won’t be going many places because I’ll have 4 kids under 3 years old. Or when Dan mentions doing something fun or going out together I start wanting to prepare him for the change by saying no, let’s just stay home or that’s too much trouble and we need to get used to the fact that for this chapter in our lives… it’s just okay to be homebodies. But really, I should be wanting to go and do and I should take every chance to have an adventure with my husband and two kiddos now… I should soak up life right now, because that’s what God has given me. There are no guarantees about what tomorrow or next month or next year will look like…. just that God will sustain us and give us the wisdom and contentment to live in it. I need to be grateful for today and live today to it’s fullest. (If any of you have ever adopted, you know that it’s easier said than done… because you’re constantly preparing for tomorrow or next month or whenever you are to go get your kids, that’s just the nature of adoption… planning for the unseen but hoped for)
Zoe and Jack are growing up so fast and so wonderful!!! They are best of friends… worst of enemies. They LOVE sharing a room and talk to each other in the morning time before I go fetch them from their baby-beds. Sometimes I sit outside their door and just listen and laugh at what all they are saying. It’s REALLY cute!
Zoe is SO smart…. the way her mind processes things and the way she understands things is amazing I think for a 2 1/2 year old. (but then, she’s the first 2 year old I’ve ever had… so I’m loving this path of discovery she’s on) She is my neat and organized one, I HOPE she will help her momma out one day since I tend not to be organized and neat. She loves to line up and sort and count everything. And she’s really great already at bossing Jack around. She’s a wonderful big sister and I can’t wait for her to be a leader to all her brothers and sisters as they grow up together over the years. She has a very tender heart and sometimes that means she falls apart when Jack says the wrong thing to her…. and sometimes that means she knows when one of us is upset and she’s quick to come hug and ask what’s wrong. She can put on her own shoes. Still sleeps with Blankie. Refuses to go potty. Constantly in conversation. She LOVES: playing pretend. jewelry. numbers. mrs.spider sunny patch. orangies. when her aunts and uncles come play. (she talks about them for days afterwards!) and Her Daddy!!
Jack… well, this guy has started talking and he won’t stop…except for when Aunt Kristin tells him a secret. He loves that.
He runs everywhere and loves being everywhere he’s not supposed to be… like bathrooms and kitchen drawers. He jumps from one piece of furniture to the next like a flying squirrel. He wants to know what you’re doing all the time and will keep asking you over and over. He HATES to be left out so when Sissy gets to go somewhere and he can’t…. he is inconsolable for quite some time. I’ve caught him on several occasional just stroking Zoe’s hair like he’s fascinated with the texture. He reminds me that he’s still kind of a baby when he just wants his sippy cup first thing in the morning and will just sit in the corner of a couch or right by my side and suck his juice down. There is about nothing this boy won’t eat and he’s hungry ALL the time. He is A LOT rougher than Zoe and we just keep saying how great of a athlete he is going to be… With his head butt and sheer strength He’s going to dominate the Football field!! He LOVES: colors. graham crackers. clean up song. ring around the rosey. to run. and His Mommy!!
I wanted to write all this down… because yes, I’m struggling to live IN today when my heart longs for two babies who are struggling to live today….
But I want to Savor and Remember all what I am blessed with and experiencing TODAY, because Zoe and Jack, you make my life filled with SO much joy and laughter and wonder and delight!!! I remember at times growing weary of paperwork and appointments and deadlines that were in hopes of one day having you in our home…. I knew it would be worth it, But I had no idea it would be THIS MUCH worth it!! You make me the happiest momma I could have ever imagined being. I’m so glad God chose me to love, nurture, kiss, feed, and adore you two. You both have changed me and for the better. I’m really really proud to be your Mommy. I love you a bushel and a peck and a whole lot more!!