troublesome creature

A blog friend of mine who lost his son Luke this past year wrote this on his blog the other day and I found it really relating to my thoughts and this experience. Here is what he wrote: 

This grief thing is a troublesome creature.

It forces me like nothing else ever has to live in the tension of unbelief and belief, uncertainty and certainty, sadness and gladness, brokenness and redemption, bitter and sweet, anger and calm, fear and courage, weakness and strength, despair and hope, darkness and light.    

This concept of grieving with hope is rife with paradoxical realities.

I find that speaking and thinking about our loss is both cleansing and caustic. It just depends on the day… the moment really. 

The tears that fall have the same effect… they open and purify the wound but they also prompt the realization that this wound will always weep because there is no getting over an injury like this.

The reminders of shattered dreams and hoped-for-things are all too frequent. They are as certain and unwanted as taxes coming due. They are anticipated and dreaded like a trip to the dentist. They lurk and then surprise like a thief. They taunt and they haunt. 

This grief thing is a troublesome creature. 
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